Psalm 32

While I kept silence, my body wasted away through my groaning all day long. 4For day and night your hand was heavy upon me; my strength was dried up* as by the heat of summer. Selah
5Then I acknowledged my sin to you, and I did not hide my iniquity;I said, ‘I will confess my transgressions to the Lord’, and you forgave the guilt of my sin. Selah
6Therefore let all who are faithful offer prayer to you; at a time of distress,* the rush of mighty waters shall not reach them.

Lord,

The Poet is clear. When he refused to face and name his sin, he was miserable. “My body wasted away.” The inability to face and name his own sin in the presence of God seems to have affected, not only his spiritual connection with God, it affected him physically as well. Sin, guilt is a powerful force. The denial of sin can hurt, even kill the denier.

The he looked to you and confessed. He named this destructive reality in his own life. He faced it and he named it both to you and, I suspect, to himself. He is not even explicit that he repented, that he promised to do better – though I suppose it could be assumed.

He confessed and he was forgiven! Now, why is that so hard? Why is it so hard to face the simple destructive realities of my own life? Why is it so hard, even in secret prayer, where nobody else is listening and nobody else has to know, to say to you, “Let me tell you about me. Here are the sordid details.”?

Maybe, when I am in the midst of the mess, I don’t really want to talk to you. It could be the embarrassment of the thing. Or, as likely, I don’t want deal with me. When I name it, it’s mine to own. I cannot pretend to myself any more. Maybe that’s it. All I know for certain today is that honest confession is a hard thing to do.

But the poet is clear that confession is indeed good for the soul. And it is really good for the body too. So grant me the grace I need to stand before you in complete honesty. Grant me the courage to face myself in those moments when it’s ugly do so.

Lord, in this world, we need good strong defenses to protect ourselves. But, in your presence, grant me the grace to let my defenses down and to trust you with the stories of my life, the all too true stories of my life. Allow me to trust you to love me anyway and to have confidence in your pardon.

Personal Prayers:
Name one personal sin before God. You can name other sins later but start with just one that you can say. Name it in the fullness of its reality and ask God to forgive.

Name 5 things for which you are grateful and say “Thank you to God.”

In Christ’s name,
Amen.